Barstool Chicago Insults Draft Grades

Chief

Best Pick: Fat Ass

Being called a fat ass is the worst, particularly when you don't expect it. You can take being called stupid, ugly, or some version of a penis, but being called a fat ass just seems personal.

Worst Pick: Pigeon

This pick stinks. If someone called me a pigeon, I would simply just laugh. It would not offend me in the slightest. 

Grade: C

Eddie

Best Pick: Clown

Good value in the third round. Being called a clown means the person has absolutely no respect for you. Which is a bigger insult than the word itself.

Worst Pick: Weirdo

I know I'm a weirdo, someone calling me that doesn't make me feel any worse. Most people are weirdos, it isn't revolutionary when you call someone it. 

Grade: B

Dante

Best Pick: Pole Smoker

Hey, I'm inclusive of everyone but being called a pole smoker sucks. I think it's because you usually have to think about it for a second before fully understanding it just lets it sink in more. You can't have an immediate comeback. 

Worst Pick: Squeezer

Is this an insult people use? I have simply never heard of this. 

Just a general note, many of these picks seemed a little old-fashioned compared to the others, which I think will lead to worse performance on the graphic. 

Grade: D

Carl

Best Pick: Mooch

What hurts about being called a mooch is it is much more personal than the others. If you get called an asshole or scumbag, that is in the heat of the moment. If you are called a mooch, then that person has thought about calling you that for a long time. It is such a good pick because it is probably true. 

Worst Pick: Motherfucker

Eh who cares about being called a motherfucker anymore? We have gotten to a point where it is almost a compliment to say you get MILFs.

Grade: A

Dave

Best Pick: Cock

If someone calls you a cock instead of a dick, then they clearly do not like you. It is just an angry-sounding word that has a lot of bite to it. Great pick from Dave.

Worst Pick: Cunt

If someone called me a cunt, I'd assume it was a frat bro or a thirty-year-old British man, either way, I wouldn't find it insulting in the slightest. 

Grade: B

I think Carl wins b2b, just a very good draft top to bottom.

Predicted Winner: Carl

Predicted Loser: Chief