Barstool Chiacgo Thankful Draft Grade

The Chicago crew is back and in honor of Thanksgiving, they are drafting things they are thankful for. They are joined by local funny man and noted garage hater KB. This was a pretty fun draft in my opinion, read my thought below!

Round 1 Pick 1: Air Conditioning, Carl

Great pick from Carl. Whenever AC goes out, your enjoyment in life goes down significantly. Life before air conditioning had to be miserable. It is just so completely necessary for our lives at this point that it is something I personally could not live without. A strong pick from Carl.

Grade: A+

Round 1 Pick 2: The Internet, KB

Another strong pick. Even though it has many faults, the internet is something to be thankful for. I just know my life has been made so much easier because of it and I think many people recognize this. Good pick from KB.

Grade: A

Round 1 Pick 3: Football, Eddie

Great pick. Fall would be significantly worse without football. College, NFL, fantasy, the Super Bowl, Friday nights at your high school. Football brings us together. America is built on football and I think most people are thankful for it in some capacity. Strong pick. 

Grade: A+

Round 1 Pick 4: Dogs, Dave

I'm going to get hate for this, but I don't like the pick. Especially in the first round. Like I'm fine with dogs, but idk I feel like there are a million things I am more thankful for besides them. At the end of the day they are just animals and if we didn't have them our lives would be virtually the same. 

Grade: C+

Round 1 Pick 5: Indoor Plumbing, Chief

Now this is life saver pick. I would hate having to take a dump in the middle of the night in January and either shitting in a bowl or having to walk outside to my outhouse. Very underrated that we can just flush and forget. Good pick.

Grade: A

Round 2 Pick 1: Electricity, Chief

In theory, this pick is good. But I feel like it is so non-specific. Like I don't think Chief is thankful necessary for electricity itself, but the other things that it fuels. So I think the pick is ok, but should've been more specific because electricity provides so many things.

Grade: B+

Round 2 Pick 2: Alcohol, Dave

Is Dave an alcoholic? I just feel like this is such a weird thing to pick so high in the draft. Like I guess drinking is fun, but I feel like, in general, most people could live without it. Overall I think this is a subpar pick.

Grade: C+

Round 2 Pick 3: GPS, Eddie

Strong pick. Maps are a hastle and I was pretty much just old enough to remember printing out on mapquest. It is so nice to have directions in real time and not having to memorize how far you've gone and which exact exit you have to take. The GPS takes a lot of stress away from driving in unfamiliar places. Strong pick.

Grade: A

Round 2 Pick 4: Music, KB

I think this is a sneaky underrated pick. I'm not a huge music guy, but my life would be so much different without it. Imagine working out, riding in the car, watching movies or TV without music. We are just so used to it we can't even imagine how differently life would be without music. It is so important to daily life and really something that makes sense to be thankful for.

Grade: A

Round 2 Pick 5: Founding Fathers, Carl

I love America, therefore I love the founding fathers. Say what you will about how they are bad people, it doesn't matter to me. They still created the single greatest country to ever exist in human history and you can't convince me otherwise. 

Grade: A+

Round 3 Pick 1: Drinking in a Garage, Carl

Chief pick alert. Not a good pick. 

Grade: C-

Round 3 Pick 2: My Health, KB

I mean this is a funny pick. I would say most people are thankful for their health so I guess it isn't terrible. I just really think KB was trying to get a laugh here and honestly it will probably work.

Grade: B

Round 3 Pick 3: Ridesharing Apps, Eddie

I guess since I live in a more rural area where I just drive everywhere I don't really use ridesharing apps that often. I guess the pick is fine, it isn't great. Besides uber and lyft, you still have other options to get home when you are out so I feel like it might not be as revolutionary as some of the other picks, however it is still helpful. Overall I think the pick is good not great.

Grade: B

Round 3 Pick 4: Being able to piss wherever you want, Dave

Lowkey a really good pick. I, as a man, like being outside and just being able to post up on a tree whenever I need to go to the bathroom. It is very liberating. With all of this being said, is it one of the top five things I am most thankful for? Probably not. It's nice but not like a life changing thing.

Grade: B+

Round 3 Pick 5: Cable, Chief

I don't hate the pick. I'm old-fashioned, I like cable. Streaming services are nice, but nothing beats flipping through the channels. Chief was also right in the idea that they are 100% better for watching sports. With all of this being said, most people will view this as a bad pick.

Grade: C+

Round 4 Pick 1: Ice Makers, Chief

Now this is an interesting pick. I've always had an ice maker so I guess I could possibly take it for granted. However I have had to fill up the ice tray at my grandmother's house and it seemed like a pain in the ass. So I tend to think this is a good pick, but don't know how well it will be received. 

Grade: B-

Round 4 Pick 2: Nicotine, Dave

This is just a bad pick. Like come on Dave. 

Grade: D

Round 4 Pick 3: Snowblower, Eddie

This was an underappreciated pick during the draft. Shoveling snow is awful. Having a snowblower turns like a 3 hour job into a thirty minute one. It has certainly saved me a lot of shoveling time in my life. Good pick especially this late.

Grade: A

Round 4 Pick 4: Cars, KB

This was a pick that wasn't really given enough praise. Without cars, we would be stuck riding horses around everywhere. Do you know how much that would suck? I like being able to get into my weather controlled bubble and pick a song and drive wherever I want at whatever speed I want. 

Grade: A

Round 4 Pick 5: 90s Bulls, Carl

I understand the pick, but it really only works for a certain subset of people. If you aren't from Chicago you really don't appreciate the pick as much. I think it isn't a bad pick in their own bubble, but in their audiences eyes it is just ok.

Grade: B-

Round 5 Pick 1: The Troops, Carl

I am torn. This is a very clear an obvious pander from Carl. He knows his draft isn't spectacular so he picks something hard to vote against. I think the troops are great. I respect them and I thank them because I couldn't do that myself. Carl knows people think like this and is trying to get votes. I won't grade the pick poorly because I respect the troops, but I just want everyone to know that this is in fact a pander and no one will call it out because they don't want to dislike the troops.

Grade: A

Round 5 Pick 2: Nick, KB

Now, in all seriousness, this isn't a good pick. However in the crowd that votes, this is an amazing pick. Honestly could be enough to win the draft. It will just be so funny having a picture of Nick on the graphic that people will want to vote for it.

Grade: A

Round 5 Pick 3: Putin Bay, Eddie

Sounds like a decent place, but it only applies for a certain subset of their voting pool. With that being said I think that this makes it just an average pick. What saves it is the fact that it was taken in the fifth round, when it doesn't really matter.

Grade: C+

Round 5 Pick 4: Birth Control that isn't condoms, Dave

Never change Dave. Never change. I mean like this isn't a good pick, but it is just so funny I have to give it a good grade. Dave's draft stunk anyways so who cares.

Grade: B+

Round 5 Pick 5: Hockey, Chief

Chief will always stick to his guns and he does so right here. Smart to take hockey this late because it really isn't an awesome pick, there just aren't that many hockey fans in the world. However, it is a good pick in the fifth because it will sway hockey fans and really doesn't look bad opitcally.

Grade: B

I think KB and Eddie are gonna be in a dog fight. I think if KB just took it a bit more seriously he couldv'e pulled it out, but I think Eddie wins. But, KB has the massive trump card of drafting Nick, which may just get him a ton of votes when it all comes down to it.

Predicted winner: Eddie

Predicted loser: Dave