Barstool Chicago America Draft Grades

The Chicago boys are back and they are drafting things that represent the greatest country in the whole damn world, America. They are joined by Glenny Balls and Canadian and former NHL player Paul Bissonnette. A great draft to get us ready for the fourth of July.

Round 1 Pick 1: Football, Chief

Football is one of the most American things ever. It is so ingrained in American culture and is certainly fitting of the first overall pick. It would've been very high on my board.

Grade: A+

Round 1 Pick 2: Pizza, Dave

Bad pick from Dave. Pizza may be American, but I certainly don't think of it as American food. 

Grade: F

Round 1 Pick 3: Hollywood Sign, Biz

This is actually an awful pick in my opinion. LA is one of the least American places in the whole country and the Hollywood sign wouldn't be in my top ten landmarks, much less the first landmark taken. Terrible pick.

Grade: F

Round 1 Pick 4: American Flag, Ed

A very good pick from Eddie. I didn't really see it coming, but it is solid. It will get a lot of votes because everyone loves the American flag. 

Grade: A+

Round 1 Pick 5: American Girl, Glenny

Ehhhh. It's a good song, but it doesn't come to mind first when I think of "American Songs". So it's a good but not great pick.

Grade: B

Round 2 Pick 1: Baseball, Glenny

I love baseball. It's my favorite sport. I think it is the best sport to attend live. But, it's just so hard to compete with football. I like the pick, I just don't really know how it plays.

Grade: B-

Round 2 Pick 2: America the beautiful, Eddie

Good song. A little slow for my taste, but it really is a good song. I think it will get votes and is overall a good pick.

Grade: A-

Round 2 Pick 3: Living in America, Biz

This is again, another good song but doesn't really scream "America" to me. It's a fine pick, but wouldn't be at the top of my list.

Grade: B

Round 2 Pick 4: Statue of Liberty, Dave

Awesome pick from Dave. This would be my first overall landmark. It's very symbolic of America and inturn the American dream. Tremendous selection.

Grade: A+

Round 2 Pick 5: Cheeseburger, Chief

A good pick. A staple of every American cookout and pretty much every fast-food restaurant. Very American even though it is, in fact, a German food.

Grade: A

Round 3 Pick 1: Mount Rushmore, Chief

Good pick from Chief. Apparently, it is a bit underwhelming when you get there, however, I still think the pick has good value. It is probably the second most popular monument behind the statue of liberty, and it is very iconic. 

Grade: A

Round 3 Pick 2: Born in the USA, Dave

Very good song selection by Dave. It was my 2nd overall song. Very strong pick and many people think of it when they think of American songs.

Grade: A+

Round 3 Pick 3: Hugh Hefner, Biz

Eh. I think they were really overhyping this pick. When I think of great Americans, Hugh Hefner isn't high up the list. But, little known fact about Hugh, he actually helped people escape from East Germany to West Germany when he was younger. He wouldn't be my top five Americans selected. However, I think he gets votes from horndogs like WSD.

Grade: C

Round 3 Pick 4: Hulk Hogan, Ed

Again I don't love the pick, but I think it's a lot better than Hugh Hefner. Hogan is a more patriotic pick for sure. I was really thinking of American historical figures, not celebrities. A decent pick.

Grade: B

Round 3 Pick 5: Hot Dogs, Glenny

Personally, I think this is my number one American food. It's the first food I think of when I think of America. I think it's a good pick.

Grade: A

Round 4 Pick 1: Lincoln Memorial, Glenny

Lincoln Memorial is the third-best landmark in DC. However, it is still a very good monument. Lots of important things have happened at the Lincoln Memorial.

Grade: B

Round 4 Pick 2: Apple Pie, Ed

So Dave is fucking moron. Apple Pie is certainly very associated with America, and I think it is a great pick. I love the pick and think it is the most American dessert. Having Pie and Vanilla ice cream is extremely American.

Grade: A

Round 4 Pick 3: S'Mores, Biz

This is actually the only food taken that was invented in America, so kudos to Biz. It's a great pick. Not much to say, just a very good pick.

Grade: A

Round 4 Pick 4: The American Dream, Dave

I actually think this is an awesome pick from Dave. The American Dream is what the country is built on and I think it will actually get votes. 

Grade: A

Round 4 Pick 5: Party in the USA, Chief

I actually think this is a solid pick in the fourth round. People like the song, everyone knows the words and generally everyone likes it. 

Grade: B+

Round 5 Pick 1: Michael Jordan, Chief

These guys stink at drafting Americans. Michael Jordan is good but he isn't some great American representative. I think there are only three athletes I would draft and he didn't make the cut. (My athletes would be Jesse Owens, Michael Phelps, and the miracle on Ice hockey team)

Grade: C+

Round 5 Pick 2: John F. Kennedy, Dave

This is the best pick so far. He wouldn't be my first  president taken, but at least he is like a major American figure. I have to give Dave credit for actually taking a strong American pick.

Grade: A

Round 5 Pick 3: NASCAR, Biz

This is a good pick but won't get any votes. Generally, people seem to have a negative view of NASCAR. But I get the idea that it is very American.

Grade: B+

Round 5 Pick 4: Golden Gate Bridge, Ed

This is a pretty good pick from Eddie. I think there were a few things I would've taken over this, however I think it is one of the better landmarks selected. 

Grade: B+

Round 5 Pick 5: Forrest Gump, Glenny

Probably the best fictional character. One of the most American movies in my opinion. Strong final selection. 

Grade: B

Overall a very good draft. I think Dave actually has a very strong chance of winning this week. Him and Chief are neck-and-neck in my opinion. I think Biz has the worst draft by far, but since he can't get voted off Eddie will be the odd one out this week. I'm predicting a record low voting percentage from Biz, I'd be shocked if he gets five percent. But what do you expect from a Canadien in an American draft?

Predicted Winner: Whitesoxdave

Predicted Loser: Eddie